The only thing in this world that bites you more often than a mosquito is your boss

The Great Goan fenny

In the night at nine, I could see the divine, my lips were thirsty, I wanted to have full masti, I came closer and kept her on my lap,I could here someone clap, I brought her near my lips, with a sound it all started - I gave her some dips, it was a long time since I had any. Yes, I am talking about the great Goan Fenny :D

Made in China

China's dominance in Manufacturing sector cannot be left unnoted. It was just the other night when in my dreams I was standing in-front of the hell and a signboard outside the gates read "Made in China".

Everything changes with time :- people, relationships and even the meaning of certain words. When I was in Junior KG, log meant "a piece of wood". As I entered 4th standard for me log was an "exponent required to produce a given number " and now as a software developer I know log as a tool to track bugs. Strange but true.

Men are from Mars women are from venus

I was sleeping on the sofa lying almost straight,
Suddenly I heard someone knocking at my gate,
I opened the door and my eyes fell straight,
On the door was a girl, perfect for my first date,
I asked her in ,
As if ready to commit a sin,
She gave me a smile,
As she walked down the aisle,
She sat on the sofa with a grin on her face,
I could find only myself in this lovely race,
I offered her some drinkAnd sat on the brink,
She told me she wasnt commited and was still single,
I told her even I was ready to mingle,
I could hear her sighsIt was hard to believe my eyes,
As I approached her with naughty intentions,
Appeared on her forehead - clear lines of tension,
She stood there for me as a bait,
I wanted to make her my soul mate,
Suddenly I heard someone shouting @ back of my head,
I opened my eyes and I saw myself lying on the bed,
It was my maid, that old titch,
Why did my luck gave me a ditch,
she told me it was morning,almost half past eight,
she wanted to empty the dirty bin crate,
As I opened the gate and looked beyond the sight,
I could see another fairy in red and white,
I cant help it I am a boy of genus,
Men are from mars and women are from Venus.

Aaj se pehely kabhi kisi ladki ko dekh kar mere man main ye khayal nahin aaya ki "Jhadu pochey key kitney legi ? 350 ?? Nahin !! 300 main mana loonga " :D

My response to the humble question " How was ur day ?" Well, dude if it was really that good, I wouldn't have met u in the first place. And now, since u know it is already mayhem, please dont add to it my making me feel ur presence any more. :D

They say "Love sucks". Love does not suck, it is the lover !!!

He always says "that galaxy" , but I keep hearing "that gal is sexy " :D ?

Work experience and a bottle of wine are similar in the sense their value appreciates with time.

If people start co-operating the word 'crime' will soon be out of the dictionary

A snake in hand is never better than two in the bush

Suresh Kalmadi and his aides seem to have a very limited vocabulary. They always think it is "Come- on wealth" and not Commonwealth.

Life is like the syntax of a sentence; a single mistake and there is a whole new dimension to it.Sun sets in the east or Sunsets in the east ??

A computer grad is one who thinks DOS and DONTS are both Operating systems from Microsoft

To all those people who want to see how big my heart is , attached is my chest Xray Report

In the language of Chemistry, Girls are exothermic (hot) and men are endothermic (cool)

Ek aur Saal gujjrat jaat hai,
Pichhey chhod ghotalon ki baaraat hai,
Aaj bhi shaadi ke beech aati jaat hai,
Har sarkari naukar pet bhar kar khaat hai,
Netaon aur naukar shahon ki hi to saugat hai,
...Ki Pyaaz aalu ka dam itna badhat jaat hai,
Aam insaan ki bolo kya aukaat hai,
Paisey waalon ki hi to sheh aur maat hai,
Har aadmi aaj yehi rot jaat hai,
Ki Mehengai dayaan khai jaat hai

Being a C programmer I may not get object oriented even today :(

I dont know who coined these cocktail names. I mean, just imagine one of your friends walks out from the bar and says " I had a shot of Red headed slut and another of Hairy virgin"!!!

On Manmohan Singh invites Pak PM, President to watch Mohali match

What Manmohan is doing to Pak PM and President is called tease and what the Pak cricket Team is going to do in front of Indian Cricket team in semifinal would be called strip -tease.

On Mahela Jawardena scoring century in world cup final

Mahela Jayawardene should be booked under section 375 of IPC.

Power of google

Project milestones

Suo Motu Cognizance

The phenomenon of a fat boy noticing and observing a fat girl is called suo motu cognizance.

Safalta ki kunji

Bheja garden hai aur tension maali hai,
Kismat to aisi upar waaley ne likh daali hai,
Din ujla lekin raat kaali hai ,
Subeh tak to bhaiya der honey waali hai,

Lekin Honsla buland ho aur sachchai ki raah tuney agar apnali hai
To koi bhi mushkil tera kuchh nahin bigad paney waali hai
Vishwas ki raah na chhodna kyunki safalta usi ko milney waali hai
Jisney har haalaat main di sabko taali hai.